I noticed that my blog hits jumped to a lot more than usual yesterday, and holy shit people have spent a lot of words on my behalf! Someone linked to me at MetaFilter posing the question: Urban Scout. Sincere crusader for sustainable living, or poseur hipster douchebag? Well it seems the Internet nerds, who have a long history for not reading into irony or reading at all (and a deep, deep love of civilization) have made a unanimous choice: Poseur Hipster Douchebag! You heard me right folks, unanimous; 42 out of 42 commentors hated on me. I can’t help but think that just last week when I complained to my friend Rory that I had gotten a few letters of hate mail, he said:
Seems like a “Hate on Scout” theme has popped up on the good ole Intraweb-thingy lately. Sucks but it means you are doing some shit right. There is a comedian who’s name escapes me who said, “Got 5 haters? That’s not enough!! You need at least 50 haters. That way you know you’re doing shit right, makin’ waves and getting yourself out there. More Haters means More badassness on your part.”
Holy shit Rory! I think I did it! A whopping 42 people (42-fucking people) took the time to hate on scout so far, and not a single one who came to my defense! If you add those with last weeks letters… I’ve hit 50 dedicated haters! Now I’ve got more badassness than ever. (sniff, sniff) You hate me. You really, really hate me.
—
Show your support and appreciation for Urban Scout
24 responses to “Poseur-Hipster-Douchebag of the Year Award!”
Don’t let it get to you. MeFites are haters’ haters. My own commenting history at MetaFilter is basically a record of just about every argument the site’s ever had about civilization, and you can see how it goes down. With a few notable exceptions, not only have they never questioned the value of civilization themselves, but they have a rabid, irrationally ferocious response to anyone else doing so, either. Not only do they trot out the same, tired arguments that were completely vapid centuries ago, but they keep on repeating them, over and over and over again, sometimes immediately after I just posted the counter-argument that shows why it’s wrong. I swear, even when I was a good faithful Catholic boy, listening to old ladies chanting the Rosary, I never heard mantras intoned so religiously to ward off the evil eye. And the delicious irony is, they think of us as the irrational ones!
“If you’re asking if he’s a ‘poseur hipster douchebag,’ the joke’s on you.” Haha. Thanks Jason. I knew you would understand!
“You need at least 50 haters. That way you know you’re doing shit right, makin’ waves and getting yourself out there.”
You know who else had a lot of haters?
That was my favorite.
Yeah, those kids know how to pour on the hate.
Ha!
And yet another joke that is on them.
“Yeah, those kids know how to pour on the hate.”
As much as you might want to believe it’s hate, I don’t think anyone actually cares enough to hate.
It’s more like contempt.
Dersins,
They sure care enough to write something ignorant. It’s easier than learning something new I suppose.
Jason,
Thanks for coming to my defense so hard over there. You didn’t have to. I don’t have the $5 it takes to sign up for that shit, or at least didn’t feel like spending it on that. Thanks for doing that.
Rix,
Yes, many jokes on them. Basically they’re simply shells of people who are full of mythology. They have never read an anthropology book and they didn’t even read much about me apparently. One of my faves is that they say that “his girlfriend must have a razor handy to shave her legs” cause in the photo they link to you can’t see penny’s leg hair, which she does have but since she’s never really shaved it hasn’t grown in all thick. Anyway, so many stupid things… I couldn’t believe so many people, so many could be that mean. I’m trying to not let it get to me, but after that assholes letter last week… All this shit just hurts. People don’t do the work of actually reading about me and what I believe because making assumptions and judging are way easier than learning something new and seeing the world in a different way. fuck that shit.
Just a quick word of support for our (mostly loved, but apparently from some quarters hated) Scout. His article on skinning & butchering his roadkill squirrel a couple months back gave me the prodding and example I needed to get me past the mental block of not knowing where to begin with my own dead rodents. I passed up several opportunities over the last year for making full use of our furry neighbors’ deaths, but the first chance I got after reading Scout’s article, I made myself do it (“Hell, the way Scout details and describes it makes it look pretty straight forward!”)
So, I applaud Scout for his shining example and inspiration–I feel pretty confident plenty of other people out there learn from his activities both offline and online.
By the way, I wanted to post this to metafilter, but I don’t value giving them feedback enough to shell out $5 for it, so I’m just posting it here.
Cheers,
Scrub
Hey, no problem. There are a few decent, open-minded folks over there, but for the most part, it’s the Leftist equivalent of a fundamentalist church. Unfortunately, they get a lot of traffic, so every time primitive skills or civilization comes up, there’s a slew of people who get just blatant misinformation from this ill-informed and closed-minded assholes, so I slough through the trenches so the innocent passer-by at least has a fighting chance. It’s awful, thankless work, but somebody’s got to do it.
Thanks Scrub, that’s very nice of you to say. Glad I could help!
Jason, the fundamentalist analogy is spot on.
Urban Scout you totally fucking rock my face off!
I am glad you can make light of this situation. Props to you. I just had some anonymous comments on my blog and I felt pretty angry about it but realized that these anonymous internet people probably have lives that are unfulfilling and that’s why they are spending time on the internet judging others behind their computer screens.
Yeah, I’m only laughing on the outside… 😉
I laughed my ass off at that. And then I cried a little.
Pearls before swine. If only the leftist fundamentalists could go feral as readily as real pigs do when the shit hits the fan.
I read some of the so-called haters’ comments but not all. That’s because I have a real life and also a theme emerged rather quickly so that I did not need to read all of them to get the picture.
Here’s the fallacy: imagine that I have pretensions of football greatness. I scrimage with my buddies on weekends and even take to wearing the jersey of my favorite team around town. I talk football. I walk football. After a time I get pretty damned good at it. Then I start a blog and start writing about football. What would you say to a gaggle of iNerds whose reaction to my blog was “What a poser! Look at that stupid jersey, shorts, and those sneakers! I don’t see him playing for the Jets! Is he making $300K a year? Call me when he does. Until then he’s a hypocrite and a poser.”
Put in that light it sounds ridiculous that my critics would fail to acknowledge the progress I had made to date, preferring instead to project their own insecurites onto me. Of course, I don’t know Mr. Scout and I don’t know these other people at the link. I’m just a guy who wandered by while I wait for a long database backup process to complete before I can move on to my next task. The Internet is like that. One minute you’re surfing anonymously and the next you’re up to your neck in fallacious arguments thrown around by 13 year old kids with potty mouths who seem spoiled rotten and in dire need of a swift kick in the ass. But what do I know.
I almost forgot one of my favorite quotes concerning douchebags:
[…] Beat it Brad Pitt, Scout and I are back together. Thanks to everyone who offered their condolences. He was just having a poseur-hipster-douchebag moment…kidding, darling, kidding. I really am getting my own trailer though. Anybody got a place I can park it? Or a truck to move it? […]
42 dedicated haters! All my warmest congrattys to you. They, them, the others, puffed up titanics puzzled by your electronic iceberg. If only a bit of insight could sink them. Cheers for scout! Hep hipster, HARANGUE!
When the power goes out those people are going to fucking die, so fuck them! The only reason you have so many haters is because you tell it like it is.
Plus you have female friends and you’re fit so that right there is enough to enrage most internet losers.
They just can’t deal with your extensive knowledge of Civ’s shortcomings, the fact that you can properly form a sentence, your rougish good looks, and most importantly, your ability to pimp short shorts that rivals Daisy Duke.
Keep it up Scout, and maybe you can reach the coveted 100 Hater mark!!
Scout you awesome little bastard! Good for you getting the inter-lumps all riled up. The same thing happens on the long distance hiking forums I use to frequent, you get a few well spoken, rational and helpful people that actually hike being drowned out by a multitude of internet hikers who read all the gear reviews, all the on-line journals and watch all the documentaries then want to tell real hikers how they should do shit.
Bah, anyway, sorry I took so long to actually register, i’ve been lurking for months. Love the site little brother. Be well!
[…] made this first one as a two part joke. One because a few hundred people have called me a douchebag and I need some love. Secondly because someone put my poster-boy picture from ReadyMade up at the […]
I didn’t read any of their comments, nor have I read any on this page. But I do read your blog, and I do work skills on a daily basis. Anyhow, here is the Katt Williams short where he’s talking about haters.
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxxPLDZnqwA
(let’s see if it’ll allow this to be imbedded:)
Sigh … Scout, I need to read your blog more often. When I see the shit you’ve withstood, it gives me a lot more courage.
Thanks Rebecca! That’s very nice of you to say.